lost and fond
Can you remember the first time you learnt how to ride a bicycle? You probably fell off and scrapped elbows and knees many a time, and if you’re like me, getting more frustrated by the moment. Until you just go “Fuck this”, sod everything and push off strongly. Lo and behold, that was what you needed in the first place, confidence, daring and momentum.
And you’ll never need training wheels ever again.
This is how I feel right now. I’ve been in quite a few relationships - and like learning to ride a bike, I sometimes fell and got bruised, sometimes I bailed because I wasn’t confident enough, or the momentum just got all screwed up. Oftentimes, I get upset, angry and vowed never to ride the bike, and declared that walking was good enough for me.
Then, as most good things invariably are, something happened without planning, without careful orchestration, and without any warning. I met someone in the unlikeliest of places, screwed up my courage and confidence, and pushed off without looking back. I didn’t need to. I found the momentum, everything I was looking for. Things snick-snackered into place like a sliding toy puzzle, and I’ve never been happier in a long long time.
